Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize