youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
