I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
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