she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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