Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
