if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
