someone owes me an orgasm
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
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You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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