saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I have aggressive nipples.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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