Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I need to calm my uterus...
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
