Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
