i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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