i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
