I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
