very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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