I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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