I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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