But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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