thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Quick, to the slutcave!
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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