Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
