yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
