Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
