how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
