Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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