i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
