well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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