Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
