i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
