I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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