at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
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I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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