dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
