Nicole vs. Life
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
