Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
So vagazzling was a success
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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