How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Randomize
