it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize