And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
