I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
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CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
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Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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