people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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