its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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