I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
