awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
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So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
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That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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