hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Randomize
