I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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