And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize
