I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
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