Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
