I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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