before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
