We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Ladies don't puke and tell
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize