I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
