Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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