Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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