Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
